Never take counsel of your fears

Have I made the right decision? I'm nearly 39 and going back to counselling. This is not where I really ever wanted to be.

Keep a journal was the advice, perhaps only a word. So this is my attempt.

I think my initial thoughts after the first session are mainly uncertainty. Am I opening a bigger can of worms than I can cope with? And then there's the cost. But it's about the same as me spending the money down the pub 'self medicating!'

I said I'd do it whole heartedly, if I'm going to talk then talk I will, but in retrospect, I know there are things that are going to be incredibly difficult to say.

So do I feel any better, anything positive. My eye opener from the first session was 'You said today was an up day, but you still seem pretty flat'

Says it all really.